Somebody out there knows my whole life story ....

OK. I'm going to tell you something that's really silly. There's someone out there that knows my entire life story, my deepest darkest secret, my past, my future, my destiny.... How? Apparently, I can be read like a book. It all started exactly a year ago when I was introduced to a fortune teller.

Really, it was just for fun and games....then, the guy told me:

#1. My deepest darkest secret and a description of who it involved, when it happened
#2. The month I was going to meet my next boyfriend
#3. What my boyfriend's deepest darkest secret is and his intentions with me
#4. The next major event that will happen in my life and who it involved
#5. The month I will be facing some legal issue involving lots of paperwork
#6. When I will meet the next guy and a description of what he looked like ...
#7. Finally...a third marriage proposal....

I laughed at all this...except for #1... cause he really knows my deepest darkest secret.

Then it happened. I get a call from my mentor, Ms. Seductress asking if I was ok and that the fortune teller called her to check up on me because this "major event" that was scheduled to happen at this time around and what he advised I should do about it... My answer to her was ... Yes, I just found out a couple of days ago and told no one! How did that darn fortune teller be so accurate !!!

I also met up with my boyfriend later and I asked him to tell me the truth because I know .... I told him that I know his deepest darkest secret and it is THIS ..... His face turned white with horror and all the hidden emotions emerged. He agreed...it happened...a long time ago ... and as he told me a story of his past that tied into the presence ... I ponder if I could ever again change the course of my destiny if I knew the path that life planned for me ....

As for the legal issue that was predicted for the month of January... it happened. I got audited by Revenue Canada! Everything's fine though...

So. Apparently I'm going to meet my next boyfriend in November. And I will get a 3rd marriage proposal by a really good looking guy ... Now, since I've ran away from the first 2 marriage proposal, I'm determined to follow through on a 3rd one...

Wait...some wierd guy tried to slip a ring on my engagement finger a couple of years ago when I wasn't looking ... does that count? How about another one that I met on vacation last winter...he told me that he only had a day an a half to convinced me to marry him....and I ran off ...hmmmm... Those don't count right? haha

My Mentor Ms Seductress...

Tomorrow, my mentor, Ms. Seductress returns to Yaletown. She is the reason why I bought my place in Yaletown. It is because I wanted to be close to her, to learn from her as well as enjoy the breath taking seawall by Marinaside Cresence.


You can say that Ms. Seductress is the master of seduction because her charisma and charm comes out naturally. And, this also accounts for the dozens of broken hearts stored in her closet that I've witness. Ms. Seductress is now retired as she has found her Mr. Perfect.

In the past years, she has taught me how to be a lady in a world where men are like bees. Especially in Yaletown, they buzz by in and out quickly... and tries to pollinate as much flowers as possible.

One must be smart and find a way to stand out from a crowd...or a bouquet.. Why? The more appealing the bee, the more flowers will be available to it. And, you don't want to be one of the flower in the bouquet. It's just a waste of your time...and eventually, any flower that fades in a bouquet, eventually gets plucked out ...

Since moving to Yaletown and taking lessons from Ms. Seductress, I've transformed from Plain Jane to a Yaletown Girl. I've aquired the image, confidence, fun-loving style and my flirting skills have dramatically improved. All this for what? In my search for my Mr. Perfect... the Perfect Bee...

There is however a flaw in my statement above... Bees by nature does not stick with one flower. They always need to continue to the next flower ... so, I'm cursed. There is no such thing as the Perfect Bee for little'o me....

The Final Chapter of little Green kite

I've decided to cut the invisible string and free the little green kite.
I realized now that my arm is sore from holding its strings too long and too tight.
I know that it is no longer mine, never meant to be.
So quickly I released little kite to fly free.

As my palm released its little string, it danced away...

In flash, a new flyer stumbled upon it, jumped up grab it out of the sky.
I quickly grab a match and lit the ends of the string.
The flames quickly travelled up the strings towards little kite.
And I watched the new flyer released it in shock.
Little kite then fell into a patch of mud.

As I turned around and walked away, I felt a nudge at my wrist.
A new string leading to a new kite ...

A Story of little green kite

Recently, I met a man who was very similar to a Kite. Let's call him little green kite. The first time we met, he hovered around me with his goofy twist and turns. And I found him amusing.

Being a kite, he's always on the go and had little time to rest. So, when there were days when the winds were slow, he would rest and enjoyed time on the ground with friends, families and his current kite flyer at the time.

When it came to my turn to be the kite flyer, I knew what I was getting into, which was just to temporarily enjoy flying this little green kite. Knowing that this kite was a very pretty kite and has been flying out and about for a long time, both I and the kite knew that it was in the nature of the kite to fly freely, far and wide...

Little green kite always believed that it was a kite that flew without a kite flyer, without strings. However, the nature of a kite was that it always need a stable flyer or a peg to ground it so it does not falter or loose control if the wind got too strong or a storm showed up out of nowhere.

Through out the years, little green kite has gone through various hands and relish in the experience of different techniques, skills and places. Some enjoyable rides, others bumpy near the end. Kite flyers around the world got to fly this pretty green kite, but often only for a only for a short little while because when its strings got too tight, little kite would escape.

Some kite flyers have enjoyed flying this kite so much that they tried to get the kite's attention when it's far away by...

* yanking and pulling on the kite's strings
* playing string guitars to entice the kite to come back, or ...
* reeling in the kite like a fish

However, this would only agitate little kite and the strings would snap on an instance and off the kite would go, never coming back.

Some kite flyers even had to cut the strings to get much needed attention or relief from holding on the strings for so long.

Flying little kite for the long term, however came with a price and the effect on kite flyers varied.

One kite flyer enjoyed flying little kite so much that she agreed to fly it on a rental by day basis, with no strings attached. This was fine for the rental by day flyer (RBD flyer) because she enjoyed flying many different kites of different size, shape, colors....and needed to fly a kite everyday and often multiple times a day. This is something little green kite could never give to RBD flyer. Also, little green kite can also explore flying experiences with different kite flyer around the world. Both would then share their experiences together as friends over brunch or during their kite flying activities. The agreement was mutual.

Unfortunately, one day when little kite came back to the local park, it saw RBD flyer flying 4 or 5 other kites at the same time. Little green kite got disgusted and decided cut the strings from RBD flyer's hand. And RBD flyer hadn't had the slightest idea why. Little kite was just never available for rent anymore and decided to stay away from anymore promiscuous flyers.

Sweet and steady was the preference of little kite and every time the kite felt that its strings were held too tight, it would tell its current flyer that it is a kite with no strings and enjoyed the freedom to fly whenever and whereever. However, as always, each kite flyer could see herself holding on to this string as real as though there was no strings to little kite.

Some kite flyers got frustrated and gave the kite a strong yank and the kite often fell into a patch of mud. And that was the end of most flyer's flying activity with little green kite.

Other long term flyers enjoyed flying the kite so much that they just kept waiting and waiting for little green kite to come back to the local park for flying practice and hopefully, one day, if they practiced enough flying, and waited long enough, they would be the owner of the kite. After years, these long term flyers would then find themselves at the local park and seeing little green kite moved on to flying activities with new and upcoming flyers. Of course, after seeing little kite out and about without a care in the world, these long term flyers would feel distraught and depression would set in.

Little green kite saw this and would then panic. It would then gave its long term flyers the same speech over and over about it having no strings and wanted these flyers to find a stable kite to settle down and have little kites of their own.

Although little kite believed it has no strings, this was in fact the opposite. There were dozens and dozens of strings attached and this grew years after years. As each connections was made, a new string would grow and some eventually mesh into a rope with inter-locking strings, twisting and twirling. When one string got yanked, depending on its location, little green kite would react differently, but often the power of the rope always win.

For instance, if a new the string emerged and the other strings within the rope knew about the new string, the tug and pull of the rope as a whole would be more forceful than the pull of the string. Often, when the new string gets entangled with the rope and not mesh well, it would be cut loose. Little kite had all the stability in the world of a rope, hopping from the comfort from one string to another within the rope. It had the best of both worlds.

One day, something happened. Little green kite met a new kite flyer. However, little that it new, this flyer was in fact another kite. Little Pink kite.

The fact of the matter was that two kites could not last as there were no stable anchorage. The pink kite knew this, but was amused by the dance of the green kite, so it played itself as a flyer. Throughout the park, words that little green kite and little pink kite were flying together and all the strings in the rope started twisting and turning, pulling heavily on little green kite and affecting little pink kite. But the largest jerk was the pull of the pink kite's strings.

Since little pink kite is in fact a kite, it was only natural for it to constantly pull on the green kite's string as it flew on its way. Little green kite did not like this and so is the same with little pink kite's the annoyance of the pull of the green kite's rope. Both decided to depart and cut their strings.

As the little pink kite flew off on its way, an invisible string linked the two together. This invisible string was like an invisible chain. Little pink kite turned to little green kite and says "There is no strings attached, so you should be on your way." However, the table has turned and now little green kite sees a string as real as it's long term flyers sees the rope attached to little green kite.

Meeting the head monk at Long Son Pagoda

Today was a wonderful day. I had the chance to do a city tour of Nga Trang city on motorbike with my guide, Huy. The young man scootered me around the city to visit locations such as the Cham temple towers, the old french Cathedral and Long Son Pagoda.

Since I've been on a spiritual mission, I've been looking for the largest temple to visit and pray, so there's no better place than Long Son Pagoda, which I almost missed seeing because Huy thought I was not a Buddhist...and therefore thought I would not be interested in visiting. Thank goodness, I mentioned that this was the purpose of my city tour.

Long Son Pagoda has a beautiful white Buddha, 79 ft tall that sat at the foot of Trai Thuy mountain and it is the main attraction of this pagoda. It was set up in 1963 in tribute to the nuns and monks who died while protesting against the Diem government. It is definitely one of the top 3 places to visit if you are in Nga Trang. Luckily, today was Tuesday, so there was hardly anyone there and I got a chance to meet and chat with the head Monk at this temple, Thích Chí Tín.

I had initially headed up to the giant Buddha, lighted incense and did my prayers at several alters, after I finished praying at the main shrine, I passed a smaller shrine next to it. In comtemplating on whether to go in and pray, my guide, Huy says I should go in, so I followed him in. There, sitting to the side was an elder monk name Teacher Chí Tín . Huy and I greeted him, we sat down and chatted. Turns out that this was Huy's temple and he often visited Teacher Chí Tín. The monk gave Huy a bracelet made of bodhi nuts. I looked at it with adoring eyes. How honourable it was to receive a bodhi bracelet, since it was very symbolic. Note that Buddha sat under a Bodhi tree when he mediated way back when. Teacher Chí Tín turned to me and gave me several book on the teaching of Buddha. Unfortunately, I do not read Vietnamese, so I was planning in my head on who I was going to woo into reading these to me. Teacher Chí Tín then gave me a bodhi bracelet and a green crystal bracelet. I thank him and made my donations, lighted an incense and bid him good bye.

Later on, I found out that Chi Tin was the head of the monastery and one of the book he have me was written by him. That really made my day and my spiritual mission.

Dear Boss, I got kidnapped by a Vietnamese Russian mafia....

So I am here in a beach town called Nga Trang in Vietnam sipping on a coconut. Some how I've found myself signing up for a PADI Scuba Diving Certification course. Silly me. This is suppose to be a vacation and now I'm doing quizzes and a final exam along with three days of intensive diving practice. Geez, what did I get myself into?

On my second day of diving, I had a nice conversation with a nice young man and he said he was heading to DaLat(a beautiful honeymoon destination) along with his tour group. He wondered if I wanted to join him. I asked how much was the tour to DaLat and he says I don't have to pay, just join him. He gave me his card and told me to call him when I get a chance.

The young man was an expat who spent 15 years in Russia. He and his family now runs a hotel and travel agency in Nga Trang.

Later on, in speaking with my sister and cousin, I asked what they thought of the idea since they both were planning to head to Dalat the same day. Little sis told me that the nice man was probably going to sell me to the black market and little cousin told me that he wanted to be more than friends, especially at such a romantic destination keke.

In the meantime, I'm figuring out how I am going to write to my boss...an excuse for me to stay longer and enjoy beach time...

Dear Boss,

I am in Nga Trang, a beach resort in Vietnam. I'm going to have to delay my plans on coming back to work....I am now kipnapped by a Vietnamese-Russian Mofia and will be sold to the sex trade market in Russia ...or force to be a Go Go dancer at some remote location in Vietnam....

Hmmm, think he would buy that? Anyways, more beach time for me! Yipeeee!!!

The Last Day at the Zojoji Temple ~ Tokyo

The Japanese way of living and their culture is fascinating. Today is my last day in Tokyo before I head for Hanoi, Vietnam. Next to the hotel I was staying at is a replica of the Eiffel Tower, except painted in red. At night, it glows like the original Eiffel Tower in Paris. This one, however, looked like a toy version with its red color.

As I walked back to the Hotel from my viewing of the Tokyo Tower, I found a temple adjacent to my hotel street. Little baby statues, in rows lined the perimeter of the temple. There were hundreds of them, wearing little red knitted hats with a little red scarfs.

In my walk along the rows of baby statues, I found one dressed distinctly from the other. This one had a white winter hat and a dark blue ski jacket. So cute! As you can see in the picture (if not to be uploaded soon) above, these mini statues are adorable. Each standing up right with hands pressed together in a praying stance, eyes shut with the look of peace and serenity. With chipmunk cheeks, each little one stands on a bed in the shaped of a large lotus flower.

In my conversations with a reporter and camera man on site, the reporter told me that these mini statues are scattered across Tokyo in the temples. Each one representing a protector of children who have passed on before their parents. Each mini statue is owned by a family and the statue is passed down from generations to generations.

I wanted to pray for all these little ones and so I bought a little wooden plaque, wrote my prayer and wishes for them, then hung my plaque up along with mini slippers I bought from the temple.



I am very grateful to have stumbled upon this temple on my last day in Japan.

Are we going to hell?...Or is it just me?

I checked the stock markets today. We are 20% down from 5 years ago!!! Are we all going to hell?

Also, I'm heading to Japan..finally, next week. I think Japan has been calling me since last year because all my romantic encounters in 2008 (most horrific or just plain bad) have been with Japanese type men. The Canadian dollar have also taken a beating and is not as favorable relative to the Japanese Yen.

1 - Jan 2008 ~ Japanese guy (aka Mr. PSI ~ Kissed him at 12 midnight New Years 2008)

2 - February 2008 ~ Half Japanese guy (aka Mr. Booty Call ~ bad encounter)

3 - June 2008 ~ Brown on the outside, Japanese on the inside
(aka Mr. Married and worked in Japan for 10 years a while back...who tried to seduce me...but didn't work...)

4 - July 2008 ~ White on the outside, Japanese on the inside
(aka Mr. Big who made his 1st millions in the Japanese Market 7 years back)

5 - August 2008 ~ Half Japanese Half White (aka Mr. Perfect, the last time we were romanticly involved was on Dec 31, 2008)

All these encounters are signs....I'm heading to Japan next week to visit the largest temple there to pray. Also, 3 out 5 of the guys above are those who I would consider "good catches" and they are all born in the year of the "Sheep". So I have encountered 3 black sheep last year...scary.

I think in my past life I may have done something wrong to the Japanese people and in this life, I'm somehow getting punished. So I'm heading to Japan for the first time to go and ask for forgiveness...and hopefully...to break this Japanese curse(?).

Oh, I also worked for an International Japanese Company in North America and they absolutely adore me! So, I'm also visiting the company's head office in Japan and getting a tour.

My best guy friend is actually Japanese (oh, I'm asian, but not Japanese) and he has a twin brother who will be meeting up with me to show me around.

I hope my visit to Japan will break the Japanese curse.....whew...tell me if I'm crazy....

Men that want to have their cake and eat it too…

Scenario #1: I haven't seen Guy #1 for about 6 months. It was my choice in excluding him out of my life as there was a weird situation that occurred between us prior to this and it was NOT very pleasant.

I've decided that it's time again that based on having common friends; I will invite him to my cocktail / hot tub party that I occasionally hold at my condo.

So, Guy #1 came by with a delicious apple flan cake. Everyone had fun at the party. A girlfriend of mine started passing out coupons for a promotional fruit yogurt at Starbucks. By the end of the night, the flan cake remained untouched. An extra fruit yogurt coupon left lying at my table.

The next day, Guy #1 called me and asked if I still have the flan cake and if it has been eaten. I said "Oh, your right, no one ate the apple flan cake, Why?". Well, he was wondering if he can come by to have the cake. I find it odd, but agreed and asked him when he wants to come by and have cake.

7pm-ish was the answer since he will finish his meeting with a client and head over by then. I said "ok". Now, I am puzzle because I don't know if he wanted to come back to take home the whole cake or come by and have a piece of cake and some tea...with me.

After hanging up the phone, I called a couple of friends and told them about what had transpired. They all laugh and said "There is something wrong with that guy". I know for a fact that Guy #1 is currently under tight financial pressure. However, in the past, he has been very generous. So I assumed that like me, I love cake, he loves cake and we both want a piece of it. (Keke) However, it was a Sunday and I want to relax rather than entertain anyone. My sister Rosalie suggest that I bring the cake down to the concierge desk and leave it there for him to pick it up. I agreed.

But... I want a piece of that cake too, so I decided that half the cake belongs to the house and the other half can return to its owner.

By 5:45pm, Guy #1, called and left a message. "I'm out my meeting early and was wondering if I can come by to have cake." He also text messaged me.

By 6:45pm, I called Guy #1 back and said that I have left the cake with the concierge and he can come by and pick it up. Also, I'm keeping the other half because it looked so good and I want to eat it. haha

Guy #1 says "Ok...but wait, there is a Starbucks coupon that I left at your place can I come by and pick it up?". Amazed...I told him that I was at my boyfriend's place and is not at home, so...No, sorry. I am puzzled once again....

In speaking with a few friends, I have concluded that:

#1 - Something is seriously wrong with this guy ~ does he not know the etiquette of giving?
#2 - He is seriously in financial trouble and wants the cake back to give it to someone else? (haha)
#3 - He wants to speak with me and makes up some silly excuse to come by.
#4 - He saw me in my bikini in the hot tub and he wants to have a piece of me, not the cake. (haha)
#5 - He wants something, but does not have the balls to say it directly to me.
#6 - He just wants cake and his coupon. ~ I think this is the case here...(haha)

Men are like software packages

Men are like software, if you get them young, they are easily customizable, specific to your needs.

The older legacy software (older men) needs to be upgraded, cause they’re primarily built on old simple logic built upon routines and through out the years, integrations between other systems are difficult. They tend to exhibit bugs and memory leaks if you try to fix them. Introduce them to a new environment and they might freeze up.

When they reach a certain age, they won’t seamlessly integrate with other systems in your environment (i.e your family, your friends), and they freeze up, they are pretty much stuck in their ways.

The older men (software) may be due for an upgrade, that is, something is not functioning properly. We need to be patient and invest more time to take care of them…or they might crash…haha Better to phase them out. Hahaha

Some men have more bugs than others, so they need to be thoroughly tested prior to committing to the purchase. Just make sure you have software warrantys.

You may disagree and perhaps say that men are nothing like software, how about hardware? You walk into a store, you want to buy, you need to check their hardware first… you need some guarantee for a few months. Perhaps you need to buy extended warranty on any risk for potential defects…and that a few years down the road, everything is still functioning or you want your money back!!

This is for the hard core software developers….technology and software is a funny thing, the more advance the technology, the more adoption of what you call “loose coupling”…like men, its more like more “loose components”. Haha

Dr. Handsome ~ A young Mr. Perfect: innocent and pure

So I just got back from my training run with my new running buddy Dr. Handsome (aka a young Mr. Perfect). Dr. Handsome is 10 years younger than the older Mr. Perfect (in his 40's), almost an exact mode of him except he is still innocent and pure. He has a couple of practices in the city, teaches at the University on Fridays and is extremely fit and intelligent.

He is very good running partner and friend to have. Recently, Dr. Handsome has been subbing in to go to lamas classes for his friend's wife. It's that sweet?

One thing about Dr. Handsome is that you can still see a kid within him. He collects pop can bottles, plays PS2 and likes to go ice skating....along with the great travels and scuba diving activities.

Ms. Sun Shine and I have witness the power of Dr. Handsome, as he sat down in a room full of people, you can see an invisible net cast upon the crowd of women pulling them in with his charisma, good looks, intelligence...and an innocence about him. He could never hurt anybody and even knowing that he has this power, he will not use it. As Dr. Handsome matures into a man, hopefully, he does not become the typical egotistical male that collects trophy women as a game.

A Cinderella Story with an alternate ending.

Today is a gloomy day, so I will tell you a gloomy story of a girl who is a very close friend of mine. Her name is Jane. She is the most beautiful girl inside and out. She have encountered many of life obstacles; too many for one person to endure. Like Cinderella, Jane came from a broken home. Mom died when she was young, Dad re-married someone new. Step mom tormented her at a young age. Think of the all the worse thing that you can think of. Yes, it happened to Jane.

One day, Jane met her Prince Charming. He was a smooth talker, has a caring demenor, but a very busy man. He lives in another State, 3 hours away from Jane. For months, every weekend, her Prince Charming would drive all the way up to see her. He bought her gifts, lend her money when she was broke, introduced her to his family.

Prince Charming wouldn't use a condom and Jane was naive about it. She thought that perhaps, he was serious with her. He even says he wants to have children with her and he wants to try to get her pregnant. She thought to herself, wow, this guy really loves me.

Jane thought that somehow all her bad luck have vanished and finally, she had found love.

One night, after driving down to see Prince Charming, she opened his laptop to use the internet while he was sleeping. What she found was shocking.

Prince Charming has been seeing and having lots of conversations with other Jane types on IM, email, online dating services...all you can think of. No wonder he's so busy. Jane was not the only one he was seeing. Other Janes have even flew from a far to visit him and stayed with him.

One Jane was just 10 minutes away for a booty call. The thousands and thousands of conversations from hundreds of Janes popped up before her eyes. And all the Janes thought that they were "special" as Prince Charming alway says.

Jane's heart was broken. Luckily she wasn't pregnant after the many attempts. Wonder if there were other Janes out there that were not as lucky as this Jane.

Prince Charming turned out to be the Prince from Hell.

The talented Mr. Good Lookin'

Mr. Good Looking is better looking than all the Mr. Perfect in the world.

He can command even more women than Mr. Perfect and perhaps even steal Mr. Perfect's girl when he's no looking… haha. I know for a fact that Mr. Good Looking can have a different girl of his choosing, in his bed, every night if he wants it. When he walks in the room, he gets the hottest girl. This is just purely based on his charisma and good looks.

Normally, I'm a sucker for Mr. Good Looking, but some how this year I've blossomed from Ms. Plain Jane to Ms. Smarty Pants with a funny bone. Again, my experiences with Mr. Good Looking varies in age (30, 35, 40) and background (Finance, IT, Restaurant Biz, etc..).

In the past, I've left Mr. Perfect and ran off with Mr. Good Looking...then got stuck with Mr. Good Looking proposing to me on top of the Eiffel Tower. How romantic! But that was because I was insane and Mr. Good Looking at the time had some sort of power over me....I've started writing poetry for god sake!

Another Mr. Good Looking that is a buddy of mine can also get away with collecting numbers left, right and center...all in the same night, he's collected over 4 numbers and these are 10's!! Not mine of course. :P

Rumors has it that Mr. Good Looking is a big, big player...and somehow he's managed to turn something so innocent...bunking with your friends...into a 3-some!!! So smooth!! Yes, yes, Mr. Good Looking, if you are reading this, you can kill me later. But I'll just bat my lashes and you'll forgive me. hehe

Now, me and my gal, Ms. Sun Shine see a different side of Mr. Good Looking. He's a little shy, introverted, sweet and very honest. A good friend to have even if he's a big player! That's right! So Mr. Good Looking, I'm glad you're my buddy. Why? You can spot another player coming for me a mile away ....and save me from the wolves...

666 Gold Standards

Wingman Jay introduced me to a guy friend of his. His guy friend mentioned the 666 Gold Standard, which I thought was hilarious! But makes sense. I also incorporated my own tidbits on the girl's side.

The 666 Standard

Male Requirements:
6 feet
6 inch
6 figures

Female Requirement:
6 times a week

** Mind you, the female needs to make at least 6 figures too, else she'll be call a gold digger.

Boy Toy vs. Boyfriend

Boy Toys vs. Boyfriends ~ Which one are you looking for?

So, I've been calling my good looking guy friends my "boy toys" and they don't mind it cause they know I'm just joking. They're just friends and it's my way of boosting my ego for having such good-lookin' hard bodied guy friends hehehe Plus, they make great arm candy especially if you put them in a suit.

Most boy toys are players, regardless. A boy toy is short term (eg. 3 months) and should only remain short-term. They are usually very good looking, smooth and social. Women are drawn to the boy toys . Now, a good boy toy will tell the girl that he's not looking for anything serious, so girls, you have to cut it at a certain point before you become "emotionally involve". Three to four months of your time should be enough.

Unless you are the ultimate "player" girl, you cannot play a "boy toy" for long term.

My rules for playing the fields are:

1. Boy Toys are good to look at (that's all) and if you want to have one, you should be ok with them sleeping with other women while they are with you. Now most women with a decent self-esteem would not accept this because if the boy toy decides to be exclusive with a new girlfriend and have never been exclusive with you in the past, then you feel like an idiot, a convenient side dish. Your self-esteem will deteriorate after watching him go through a series of relationships and having you on the side whenever he wants. That can't be good for a girl's confidence!

2. Some girls say that they have "Boy toys" and keep the boy toys for long term just for the physical pleasure because he's a "Stallion", too good to let go. Well, that's great only if you do not get emotionally involved. So how do you do that? Make sure the guy is "pretty" but he must have a flaw that you can't stand and won't settle for (eg. Not good enough for a boyfriend for you, but a good fuck). For instance, he's stupid, but he's good in bed.

Similar to how guys "play" stupid pretty girls. We girls could try the same technique. Note some boys only have booty calls with girls that they would never take out and have a romantic dinner with. Why can't us girls do the same?

I've met professional player girls and they don't even bother with playing the game. It's a waste of time. For instance, let's say you have a real hot guy and the annoyance is that he's kinda stupid and superficial. He's always looking at himself in the mirror. Now, you can play this guy because you know he's never been with an witty and intellectual girl like yourself. However, after a few months, it gets annoying and you end up dumping the guy cause he's a waste of your time.

3. A reason for why a girl would say some guy is her "Boy toy" and actually stays with him for years and years is because she actually likes him (perhaps in love with him?) and is lying to herself and all the people around her. What "Boy Toy" is worth that much time and effort? Unless she's waiting for him to realize that she is "the one" with the patient and heart to stick around. I call it desperation.

Also, I'll make my bet that this same girl would cheat on her "boyfriend" for this "boy toy". I am sure there's more to the physical pleasure that is drawing the girl to her "boy toy" who treats her like a second string, while her boyfriend would treat her like gold.

What a shame, the so call "boy toy" is just a guy that she's in love with and can't have, so she brushes it off so it won't sound like she's been "played" and a loser ...for not being able to let go.

One of my favorite quote:

The average woman is a comformist, accepting miseries and disasters with the stoicism of a cow standing in the rain.

Mr. Perfect ~ Asian Version

Here is what Mr. Perfect looks like if we combined them all into one.

See the movie ~ so romantic!!!

http://www.kateykate.com/korean-movies/seducing-mr-perfect-movie/

Open Relationships: Cost & Benefits

Source: http://www.americanchronicle.com
Author: Marwa Rakha

Open Relationships: Cost & Benefits

Benefits:

It is an ideal relationship because the couple would never get bored of one another, they get to enjoy space and freedom, and that he was open and candid about having other partners, but he would always come back to her. Life was too short! He was very honest with his girl and with all the other girls; it was a sign of how decent and open-minded he was.

So an open relationship is like an open invitation for the man to come and go as he pleased? Who would accept that? Is it like a permission to cheat? What kind of man would have the audacity to demand that?

Does it mean that exclusivity is struck out of the context of the relationship? Why would anyone want to do that? So, could the girl have multiple partners as well? What would that make of her man? Half a man?

If you delete commitment, trust, and respect from a relationship, what would you have left? Sex? Where would such an arrangement leave intimacy, bonding, and partnership? Why even call it a relationship in the first place?

In the old days, men used to tell naïve girls that they were separated.
A series of closed-ended questions should be asked for clarification;

#1. I always started with whether they lived in separate houses
#2. I asked whether they lived in separate bedrooms
#3. I asked if they slept in separate beds.

Most of the time, the answer is "no". I used to struggle as I asked for a definition of being separated, and I was always told that they were separated on the mental and emotional level.

A decade later, men grew wiser and realized that their “I am separated” line is not flying. They used the head on top of their shoulders and voila: a new type of relationships that sounds so politically sound - an open relationship was their proposition! A solution that relieved them of any previously felt guilt. He does not have to lie about his whereabouts or hide his tracks anymore; why should he when his partner gave up her right to object and agreed to become an object in his life?

There are two types of girls who would accept such a deal;

Prototype A is a girl who does not have true feelings and is using him just as much as he is using her.

Prototype B is a desperate girl who consensually gives the man the right to kick her behind whenever he pleased. Aside from the traditional code of ethics, and shockingly enough, I carry more respect for the first type, as opposed to contempt, with no traces of sympathy, for the second.

Seven commandments of a man’s open relationship

(using George Orwell’s Animal Farm model):
1. Whatever goes upon two legs, and asks for exclusivity, is an enemy.
2. Whatever goes upon four legs, or has no character, is a friend.
3. No man shall wear a wedding ring – married or not.
4. No man shall sleep in the same woman’s bed forever – married or not married to him.
5. No man shall respect women – women were created for entertainment.
6. No man shall commit to any woman – married or not married to him.
7. All people are equal but men are more equal than women.

The Casual Dater

The Casual Dater
The Commitment Cure: What to Do When You Fall for an Ambivalent Man

Ambivalence (am-biv-e-lens) n. 1. The existence of mixed feelings toward someone or something. Difficulty in reaching a decision.

Ambivalent Man (am-biv-e-lent man) n. Abbreviation: AM. 1. One who exhibits or feels ambivalence toward women. 2. One who plays games. He wants a relationship; he wants to break up. He's confused, mixed up, inconsistent, and unpredictable. Yet he's irresistible and easy to fall in love with . . . and almost sure to cause a broken heart.

Sue met Ken, a commodities trader, at a gathering at her friend's house. Although he was okay looking, she wasn't that crazy about him. He seemed like nice guy, but the chemistry level wasn't very high. When he asked her to go to a Broadway play, Sue decided to give him a chance. To her surprise, they had a good time. Afterward, he called her every Wednesday and asked her out for the following Saturday night. He always took her to glamorous yet elegant restaurants. She was sure he was seriously interested in her, figuring no man would go to these lengths for just a fling. Soon he was asking her out for both Friday and Saturday nights. It appeared their dating was leading to a relationship so she decided to take the emotional risk and become sexually involved with Ken. On the tenth date Ken told Sue that he didn't see them "having a future together" and "thought they should stop dating." He explained that he "wanted to get married but didn't want to marry her." Sue was devastated and shocked because she didn't really like Ken so much in the beginning and had tried to be mature about it and give him a chance. How could she have been so wrong about him and let herself get hurt like this? Unfortunately, she had run into a Casual Dater.

Who Is the Casual Dater?

Here's a list of signs you're with a Casual Dater so you don't set yourself up for disappointment when you find out he can't go beyond a few dates:
He is a man who is actually looking for a relationship. He really longs for marriage and feels bad that he can't seem to achieve this goal.

He is reliable and usually makes a good first impression. You can take him anywhere, to Christmas parties, weddings, and family gatherings. In fact, his excellent social skills are honed from dating so often.

He appears to be capable of a relationship because he really is interested in going out to places rather than just having a fling. He keeps calling you for dates so you think he's very interested in you.

Ironically, many women keep dating the Casual Dater even when they're not that crazy about him, because he gives the impression that he's serious about a relationship and possibly marriage.

What Causes His Ambivalent Behavior?

The main problem with the Casual Dater is that he feels entitled to "perfect" women. Despite the Casual Dater's longing for love and relationship, he's deeply committed to being with the kind of women he feels entitled to. He'd rather remain single than be with a woman who doesn't meet his expectations. The irony and maddening part is, he's unable to see his own shortcomings. Even if he's broke, unattractive, or disabled, if a woman doesn't measure up to his ideal he will not want to have a relationship with her.

Some Casual Daters have completely unrealistic expectations of the woman they'd like to have as a girlfriend or wife. They actually compare potential girlfriends to playboy models, movie stars, and fantasy women. They often have crushes on women who are in their lives but are unattainable. Sometimes they date more than one woman at a time. This increases the chances of meeting the perfect woman.

When a Casual Dater finds a woman who meets his expectations, he eventually finds something wrong with her. In other words, he always ends up devaluing the woman no matter how great he originally thought she was and how close she was to his ideal. He then becomes ambivalent and either sabotages the potential relationship by giving women the "distancing lecture" or never wanting to go beyond casual dating.

The Casual Dater is superficial and isn't capable of loving on a mature level. He can't accept another human being for who she is, flaws and all, which is necessary in order to have a long-term relationship or marriage. If the woman is going through a personal problem while dating, he has a hard time dealing with it. Although he has a nice demeanor he's basically self-absorbed.

The Distancing Lecture

After he has gone through the process of devaluing you in his mind, he delivers a lecture with one of the following themes:

"There's not going to be a relationship."
"I don't see a future for us."
"You're a great lady, but I just can't seem to fall in love with you."
"I want to get married but I don't want to marry you."

The Casual Dater can be very wounding in his need to get rid of you. He's not like the Runner, who just disappears. He will tell you bluntly when it's over. It's therefore important to understand where his lecture is coming from and not take it too personally, although this is easier said than done. Dora met Paul at a lecture on nutrition at an adult learning center. From their discussions, Dora learned that Paul was struggling with chronic fatigue syndrome. He came from a family of great wealth so he was able to support himself despite his physical limitations. He dated a lot, but never had a long-term relationship with a woman. Although she was concerned about his physical disabilities, he seemed like a nice guy and she was on a serious search for a boyfriend. They went on a few dates. When Dora didn't hear from him, she worried that Paul's health had gotten worse, so she gave him a call. Paul told Dora that he didn't know if he wanted to have a relationship with her and was now dating someone else. Stunned, she tried to talk to him about his decision because she didn't understand. Then he had the audacity to tell her he needed to decide if he even wanted to see her again!

Why Does He Act This Way?

Here are the real reasons men are Casual Daters:

1. He may have had a mother who was emotionally or physically unavailable. The sad thing is that he didn't develop the inner resources it takes to have a deep enduring relationship because of this mother's unavailability. Instead, he compensated for his lack of nurturing by constructing an ideal vision of a woman who would meet all his needs. It is this perfect woman that he's always searching for.

2. He is not in touch with his anxiety about closeness so he blames the woman's flaws for the demise of the potential relationship. He rids himself of his anxiety about closeness by either rejecting an available woman or never going beyond casual dating. With either solution he never has to deal with his feelings a relationship brings up for him.

3. He is unable to look at his own limitations or imperfections. If he had the insight to understand these dynamics he wouldn't act out his ambivalence by ending a potential relationship or staying in a go-nowhere relationship.
So how can you tell if you're seeing a Casual Dater? The following tips will help to clue you.
Signs You Are Seeing a Casual Dater
Your Casual Dater can commit more than the Man Who Plays Parlor Games, but ultimately gives himself away as an Ambivalent Man by his inability to take it to the next level.
He's had few or no relationships with women. Although he dates a lot, a relationship never seems to materialize.

He's a big expert on how to meet new women. He goes to endless singles events, clubs, and dating services to keep up an ongoing search for his ideal woman. Casual Daters are often on the Internet meeting women in chat rooms and online dating sites.
He uses personal ads a lot. He puts personal ads in newspapers, magazines, and online sites, and responds to women's ads. When he meets a woman on a blind date, he's often disappointed because she's not who he was fantasizing she'd be. His level of attractiveness is irrelevant; only his expectations matter to him.

He displays a lack of experience in relationships. Sometimes he seems naive when he talks about relationships in general.

He has tons of dating experience and stories. Sometimes he dates more than one woman at a time. He figures it's a numbers game to find his perfect woman.
Dating him never escalates to a relationship. He always wants to date around once a week or less. He doesn't show signs that he wants to become more serious. He doesn't want to see you on the holidays or introduce you to his family or friends.

Sherry met Sam after he answered her personal ad online. Just from their e-mail and phone conversations she could tell he was a walking encyclopedia on meeting new women. He seemed to know all the singles events going on around the city. He'd entertain her on the phone for hours with stories of his dating experiences. He rarely mentioned anything about serious long-term relationships. He told Sherry he thought they had a very special connection just from their phone conversations and he was dying to meet her. Due to her hectic work schedule, she didn't have much time. Sam was willing to accommodate her, however, so Sherry decided to take a chance on the day of their meeting. Excited at the prospect of meeting this man who seemed so interested in her, Sherry got all dolled up. When he walked into the restaurant he looked disappointed when he realized it was Sherry. They talked but he left shortly. Sherry didn't think Sam was so great anyway, but she would have been willing to give him a chance. She never heard from him again, but she saw his ad on all the personal ad sites for years after that.


© 2004 Rhonda Findling
About the AuthorRhonda Findling
Source:
http://www.enotalone.com/article/6183.html

Definition of Casual

Casual:

A relationship with a girl where you are pseudo-boyfriend and girlfriend, but mainly just have sex.
Source: Urban Dictionary

Casual:

You met with on occasions and known only superficially (eg. a casual friend)

Casual Dating:

Casual Dating is a loose way of dating.
Being able to say Boyfriend Girlfriend yet be able to have sex with as many people as you want.

Tammy - "I want to get back together"
Chris - "I think we should just try
Casual Dating." Tammy - "YOU PIG!!!"

Source: Urban Dictionary

Hey, isn't this the same as being in an "open relationship"?

See "Open Relationship" Blog below.
Click here for Yaletown Girl's definition of Open Relationship.

Casual Sex:

Sex without serious intent or commitment

Definition of a Relationship

relationship

1. any type of connection that brings two individuals together for a period of time

2. something other than a friends with benefits

3. more than a mutual understanding!!

Source: Urban Dictionary

Click here for definition of Friends with Benefits.

open relationship

An open relationship is one in which two people agree that they want to be together, but can't exactly promise that they won't see other people too. Basically, to have it all: a significant other and the freedom to hook up with other people. Common during college for many post-high school relationships.

Source: Urban Dictionary

open relationship (facebook definition)

A facebook setting that allows you to give in to your sluttastic urges while keeping a "saftey net" bound in the event that you're unable to hook up with anything hotter.

Source: Urban Dictionary

Click here for Yaletown Girl's definition of Open Relationship.

Definition of a Holla back girl (aka Booty Call)

See above pic - Just replace "She" with "He"

Definition of a Holla back girl (aka Booty Call):

A girl that is willing to be treated like a doormat or booty call. She is a girl that will allow guys to do whatever they want with her and will just wait for them to 'holla back' at them.
Source: Urban Dictionary

My Definition of a Booty Call (aka Holla back girl):

A girl who you call/text late at night and she’ll come around and give you what you want. She gets to spend time with a premium man, a man that has no time for her during the day, no dinner plans, no long hours talking on the phone. She’ll take what she can get, his cock.

What’s she good for? To make sure that he will survive his dry spell….

And yes, good guys ("gentlemen") makes booty calls all the time. Why? Because there are women out there who are willing to give it with "no strings attached" so that they can spend some time with this "premium man". All she needs to do is find out where he's at, show up, wait til he's drunk (the drunker, the easier to score)...and then bam! She scores!

Mind you, there are women out there that don't even know that they are the "booty call" because they are too blinded by love. They will make any excuses to avoid that reality...
Some guys tell them after that fact, which makes them "players". Don't be played.

I unfortunately found out about what a "booty call" is one night after a guy friend (who I thought was a really, really nice gentleman) texted me to see if I was hungry or wanted to grab a drink. I just got back from a night out in the town and refused the offer saying that it was late and I was a good girl! So he text me back, "ok good girl, come over and grab a bite". Since I did have a little crush on this guy, I decided to go see him. It could just be like the old times in high school where after a party, we would go to Denny’s and grab a bite to eat.

When I arrived, he led me to the kitchen. Opened the refrigerator door. We looked in. He says there’s hardly any food, he’s a bachelor. I blinked. He asked me if I wanted a frozen burrito. I said "Yes". He placed it in the microwave and offered me some wine. We talked and then started to make-out. Then, I started having a funny feeling and says it’s late, wanted to leave and we are not having sex today. He pleaded and pleaded and asked if I could just stay and have a nap and nothing was going to happen. Just a little nap until morning then I can leave. Ahh, so sweet! Really? He wants to nap with me...be with me....

It all just got a little out of hand and the last I remembered, I ran out of his place not giving into what he wanted. Whew. So I gave him blue balls...hahaha

Here's a blurb from another site that I agree with:

"Wanting to be with someone for the sole purpose of having sex with them is wrong. I believe for the individual you need to decide for yourself where your morals lie. If you feel for whatever reason, that having sex without strings attached is wrong then you should neither make nor take a booty call. On the other hand, there are those people that can see and accept the booty call for what it is; something that occurs between two consenting adults and nothing more than a physical act. For those people the booty call is totally acceptable. "

Source: http://www.baddgrrl.com/bootycall.html

Stupid Women and married/common law men

Stupid Women and married/common law men

I'm not sure what the world has come to. There are lots of stupid women out there who have insecurity issues and have nothing better to do but day dream about some guy who is not available to them (specifically, some other woman's man: married men or common law men).

This type of woman blindly falls for some guy with "wandering eyes" and a "few bucks" in their wallet is suddenly convinced that they have some kind of "special connection" between them. It is "forbidden love", so exciting!!!!

#1. It begins with this phrase: "When he looks at me, I feel something, he really, really wants me. But he is resisting...I can feel his pain (nope, no pain) cause I am so beautiful and alluring...no one can resist me... "

#2. The silly girl will make up some excuses for the idiot like this: "Yes, he is married/common law, but they have issues ....it's not going to work...because the girl he is with is":

a.) "Manipulative and tries to do everything in her power to hold on to him" (eh..hello, she's the wife/common law gf, she lives with him...you are the bad person in this situation...she is the victim...hello? anything in there???)

b.) "He is going to separate with her" (eh...yeah, "separate" meaning he will "temporarily" separate with her to have a "fling" with you! Then he is going back to his "wife" who he proposed to and promise to love forever....oh, did he look into your eyes and tell you he "loves" you with his eyes? Can you see it?)

c.) "He is such a good man, he is sticking through it with her, taking care of her, letting her down easy and slowly while he is in love with me...He is someone who deserve to be love...I love him and I will stick by his side while he takes care of his wife." (You damn bitch! you are stocking some guy and his wife!!! Get a life!)

d.) "No, no, I felt that "sexual energy" between us when we met. The tension, oh, so powerful! "(Yeah, he wants to screw you. He's a man, men are easy ~ especially these type of guys ~ they will look at any cunt walking down the street with a skirt shorter than yo mama)

e.) "He's a powerful man with lots of responsibilities and stress in life. He needs someone like me to nurture him, to be by his side, someone worthy of being by his side to support him emotionally. She's just pulling him down!! She is not as attractive as me" (yeah...she gave him children! keep away biatch!),

f.) "If I really want to, I can have him" (yeah, for a few nights and then the excitement is over and, he realizes that he just screwed over his wife!).

g.) "I'm just a proper woman and no proper woman breaks up a family" (No proper woman day dream about some other woman's man, biatch! Stop looking into the window from the outside!)

h.) "They are having issues" (yeah, part of it is you being there), "I am his only escape, his only comfort"...(Yeah, his wife's dad just passed away and she is in mourning and going through depression. Some bitch is eyeing her man and trying to steal him away at the lowest point in her life...

Someday,when this bitch falls in love and get marry, a younger, better looking skank will come by and steal her man away when she's at her lowest point...ummm right,... when she got news that she has cancer, he goes off fucking some young skank on the side while he's taking care of her...there,...what's it like being on the other side of the fence?)

It is just not acceptable behavior.

YALETOWN GIRL'S RULES

#1. Men are easy (and selfish)...if they really wants to be with you, nothing, nothing will be in their way. Many have screw over their wives and kids, their guy friends, their parents...just to be with that girl (and it's not you, so wake the fuck up!!!).

#2. Stop flirting with the bastard (at work or where ever you met him)! Of course he's going to notice a girl with dreamy eyes looking at him. He's good looking! He likes the attention, the old girl at home is the one he's committed to, that's why they are married/living together and he promised to be with her forever....or is he looking to upgrade?....great! it's you...wait until you need upgrading biatch!

Sorry, I just can't stand stupid women that actually go there...

Internet Rankings by keyword "Mail Order Bride, Sex, Porn, Lesbian"

So here I am doing research online on how to promote my blog. I've learned some internet marketing techniques, but don't let me bore you with the techie geek stuff, I'm here to talk about sex, relationship, dating along with anything real nasty and real gross...

Note: The content below is for adult viewing only.

Please do not take my writing seriously, it is just meant to make you laugh so you pee in your pants. Also my blog editor Dan the Man is either mad at me or off on New Years holidays...so don't mind the spelling and grammar mistakes...

I went on Google Trends to see what the "hottest" topics are and typed in several nasty words for fun. Interesting enough, Google Trends started ranking by regions in the world where these words are searched the most.

Top 4 region to search for "mail order bride":

*based on worldwide traffic of the word "mail order bride" in all years

** Trends are decreasing for this search word

1. United States
2. Canada
3. Australia
4. United Kingdom

Top 4 region to search for "porn":
*based on worldwide traffic of the word "porn" in all years
** Trends are increasing for this search word

1. Ireland

2. United Kingdom

3. Australia

4. Canada

Top 4 region to search for "sex":
*based on worldwide traffic of the word "sex" in all years
** Trends are rising for this search word

1. Viet Nam

2. India

3. Indonesia
4. Turkey

Top 4 region to search for "lesbian":

*based on worldwide traffic of the word "lesbian" in all years

** Trends are rising for this search word

1. Australia
2. United States
3. Canada
4. United Kingdom

My conclusion:

#1. North American men loves those mail order brides (a very high % of them lives in Yaletown)

Trends are decreasing, which means these women are divorcing the perverted old men and running away with their money. Ok, ok, just joking ~ younger generations do not have the need for this demand anymore, the economy is tanking, ok? They are moving to the cheaper alternative, Japanese "real dolls" that looks better and won't talk back!

#2. Irish men are not getting it from their women, so they are surfing for "porn". Trends are increasing, which means ...ummm, damn, can't think of anything to bs this one...

#3. The Vietnamese are starting to learn about sex and gets this information online before practicing it in the bedroom. Trends are rising which means the more "studying" translates to more "satisfaction".

#4. Those Austrialian really loves their lesbian women. Trends are rising. No comment.

Hope I do not offend anyone, this piece is purely for humor.

The ranking is however fact! ~ Jan 01 2009